So I'm at a point where if one more person asks me what I'm doing with my life I'll probably yell loudly or throw something. But fine ok...I'm the irrational one...I'm the one who at this point should have a decent response or at least a simple line figured out to deliver to the world.
The fact of the matter is that I did have a plan and Obama ruined it. Thanks to that liberal-minded, even-tempered, half-black, Ivy league, community-organizing politician in swaddling clothes, my life course has run amok.
I had plans to go to the Peace Corps after college. I was going to pursue two years of non-political, peace-loving philanthropy teaching English somewhere in Central Asia. Initially I was to leave in July of '08 - just two months after graduation. Due to a fluke in my medical records this date was eventually pushed back to September...thereby extending my post-graduation-move-back-home period. Knowing that I couldn't commit to a "serious" job with the little time I had left in the states, I started working at a Spanish restaurant near my house to sustain myself for the time being and set aside some money for my time abroad.
It was during this time that I quickly became consumed in the madness of the 2008 election. Here I go... It really seemed like Obama might be the vessel through which we could usher in a new era of progressive politics and a return to
My biggest concerns at that time were both confirmed and assuaged when I got the next round of bad news from my Peace Corps recruiter. Due to yet another complication (not my fault by the way) with my application, my applicant status was placed on hold and all of the spots for the September assignments had been filled. I was completely devastated and extremely frustrated. As much as I knew most of it had to do with internal inefficiencies and poor communication within what is after all, a government organization, my friends and family later assured me that all of these hold-ups and complications were probably a "sign" or something that was "meant to be." I absolutely hate it when people say that - especially when they're right. It never makes you feel better ya know? Not immediately anyway. Immediately its just a bad set of circumstances that has no meaning. Unfortunately lately I'm beginning to believe in fate again. I say unfortunately because I hate being wrong too. The next assignment for my program, they told me, would ship me out in March. So, between my obsession with politics and the election and having nothing to between September and March I decided to do the only thing that was equally if not more important to me at the time as being in the Peace Corps - I went to work for the Obama campaign in Ohio.
Around early November while I was still in Ohio, I received my official Peace Corps placement, the Kyrgyz Republic. I received this news at about 2 or 3 in the morning via a phone call from my brother in LA. I had just about enough energy left to google it and visit only the most reliable, accurate, up-to-date, , user-friendly site I could think of, Wikipedia. Eyes half-open I clicked on what seemed like an interesting link, traditions. If you visit the site, you'll notice that all that's listed in this section is a couple lines of information about the illegal but still prevalent practice of bridenapping. Check it out here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kyrgyzstan or this very informative PBS Frontline documentary: http://www.pbs.org/frontlineworld/stories/kyrgyzstan/thestory.html. Don't knock it til you've tried it, right? I slept well that night.
I did not end up accepting the invitation - shocker. But hold your assumptions, my decision was not simple or easy by any means. It was not motivated by fear or cultural conflict. I was perfectly aware that I might end up somewhere as backwards and the Kyrgyz Republic and initially, was fully prepared to accept an invitation to absolutely anywhere in Central Asia. Sure Thailand or the Caribbean would have been more difficult to turn down but when I said I would be willing to go anywhere, I meant it....And I know, I know I'm getting defensive here but it's just so you guys don't think I'm wimpy...cuz I'm not wimpy, I'm tough.
After having my grace period to make a decision extended (I informed my Peace Corps representative from DC that I was still working on the campaign and would not have an answer until I returned to LA), I began to realize how much I'd changed since I started working on the campaign...it wasn't a personality or character change but more of a shift in my life/career focus. I felt much more empowered and eager to take advantage of having full control of the next phase of my life. Working on a campaign can be like working on an assembly line - you are one of hundreds of underpaid drones working for the intangible output of a giant machine.
A man I met in the O'Hare airport helped me put things into perspective. His name was Jared Cohen. He was sitting across for me by our gate and told me he'd never seen anyone sleep so comfortably in an airport. This was during my layover on my way to the post-election wrap-up in Denver. I felt like a pile of rocks. We started chatting and I told him all about my campaign work, where I was going and what I planned to do afterward. I think his response to my telling him about Kyrgyzstan (a country to which he'd been, btw) was somewhere along the lines of, "the Peace Corps is something for college kids who don't know what they want to do with their life." He was actually paying me a compliment. Given my interests and experience, it seemed to him that I might consider applying to work for an NGO or a job in the foreign ministry. In other words, something that would place me on a more distinct career path and allow me to work toward something without extremely limited resources and third-world conditions. Essentially, I had the drive and motivation to go any route I chose as opposed to working for an organization like the Peace Corps that basically would, on a certain level, dictate the next two years of my life - including my placement and assignment.
In order to give a more detailed explanation of why I turned down the Peace Corps besides meeting an interesting man in an airport, I'd have to, among other things, explain what my initial motivation was for choosing that particular organization in the first place (versus the plethora of other international volunteer programs) but I won't. I think the idea's pretty clear here.
On a side note, as it turns out, that Cohen character has written a couple books about the mid-east and worked for Condoleeza Rice as a public policy aid. Go figure...
BBC Morning News: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AqksHJfOECI
The Colbert Report: http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/147625/january-15-2008/jared-cohen
Huffington Post blog: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jared-cohen/the-arab-israeli-conflict_b_157989.html
So here I am now...back in LA. I spent most of the end of December and beginning of January searching for jobs on the east coast. I have a degree in Public Relations and International Relations and figured that my academic history and recent political involvement would be enough to qualify me for a decent job in the non-profit or political sector. I considered a public policy fellowship in DC and an urban development organization in New York among some other stuff.
But then I decided to get back into acting. Ya, I know.
I'm from Southern California I should know better. I haven't told my father yet. When he finds out I'm doing this for the next year instead of taking the LSAT, I will be a strategic distance away. Since I was very young I knew that acting was something I wanted to do or at least try. When I told my parents that that's what I wanted to do my father would tell me that "all actors do is wait...wait for auditions, wait to be called back, wait tables...etc.." He's pretty much right. It is an insanely competitive, heartless profession fueled by egocentric, hopeful, starry-eyed narcissists.
That said, I am working with Jeremiah Comey, thus far a brilliant acting coach with a studio in Studio City and Mae and Frances Ross in La Crescenta and will most likely get my head shots through Begley & Clark photography http://www.begleyandclark.com/. I went to USC with Devin Begley and Nick Clark and they're pretty talented dudes - I encourage you to check out their stuff.
So the rest will follow. I am sacrificing a lot for this but I refuse to remain curious about most things in life.
...that's how Obama threw me ridiculously, unapologetically and terrifically off track.
